I get by with a little help from my friends...
I, and most of my single friends, have happily survived yet another V-day relatively unscathed, although not without some small amount of bitterness on the parts of a few- thus dubbing the day "VD" or "Suck My Ass Day". Some have asked me how we managed to do this without having to take out an emergency perscription in little purple pills.
I propose to answer this here and now. So the question is this: How do you redeem a seemingly un-redeemable Valentine's Day?
I have come up with a formula:
First, you take one incredibly sympathetic roommate. Add one funny stuffed rose, a card, and some chocolate. This gets the day off on the right foot.
Next, add one awesome Father. Combine with a gorgeous tea rose, one funny and extremely useful gift, and more chocolate. Delivered at the office, so everyone knows you got a pretty flower. This puts a grin on your face and makes the morning.
To this add a Valentine's Day "date" with the bestest lunch buddy ever (and winner of my Valnetine's Day quiz as it turns out). Mix in two or three hot chocolates laced with ample amounts of Bailey's Irish Cream and some stellarly funny conversation. This leads to an afternoon of the two of you rediscovering how to type through the mist of Bailey's... and sharing the ordeal via MSN.
While still navigating through said mists, go to Kill the Goat and read about The Pineapple Princess. This will remind you that there are people in the world who REALLY do love and appreciate their significant others, and are not afraid to tell the world. This will hopefully, at least temporarily, banish all thoughts of dying alone and miserable to the other side of the Bailey's mist and renew hope.
Next, combine the entire mixture with at least half a bottle of wine, a pair of extremely comfortable pyjamas, previously mentioned roommate, Men's Figure Skating, and a futon covered in pillows and blankets.
Let the entire mixture marinate for an hour or so.
Garnish with contact from an incredibly sweet friend who takes the time to call all of his friends (well at least the females) just to wish them a happy Valentine's Day. This will end the day with a warm fuzzy that you can even feel through the warm winey haze.
Finally, go to bed while winey haze is still firmly in place. Drink a glass of water before drifting off and you will wake up headache free on a day that, thankfully, IS NOT Valentine's Day.
So you see, it is possible to have a relatively decent Valentine's Day even without a Valentine. You just need a little help from the people who really matter- your friends and family (DO NOT forget to reciprocate!!! They need to have a good Valentine's Day too!!!). Life will go on, and it will hopefully be another 364 days before any of us again have to pretend we don't care that we're single.
ps- I would like to send a tribute out to the folks at Godiva, savers of shitty Valentine's Days everywhere. We, the terminally single and chocoholics alike, would like to say THANK YOU!