Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Help! help! the lurkers have run amok!

Lurking...

I have heard reference to this activity often of late. It can be a source of great amusement, and I'll admit: I greatly enjoy the occassional lurk.

But there is a darker side to lurking.

Let me tell you about it...

Now, as you may or may not already know, "lurking" (in the new vernacular) is the act of hanging about and making a person distinctly uncomfortable so as to persuade him or her to vacate his or her current location so that the lurker is able to effectively usurp said location. This usually means an invasion of the "personal bubble", making awkward (and unwanted) conversation, etc. It can be a lot of fun to watch people's reactions to lurkers in public places... but there is a limit.

I draw the line at lurking around people's LIVES. You want my table in the coffee shop? Lurk away, but stay away from my home and job, please.

Now don't get me wrong- it's one thing to comment on how nice a person's apartment is and to casually enquire if the current tenant is thinking of renewing the lease, and even to state your interest in the place, but it is quite another to badger the tenant constantly about when he or she will be leaving, when the lease is up, how much heat and lights cost, etc. It's tantamount to waiting for someone to kick the bucket so you can snatch his or her car at a good price. Not cool. Go away.

The same goes for a person's job. It's quite acceptable to casually enquire as to when a person's contract is up and to ask that person to let you know when they're leaving said job so that you can get your foot in the door before the rest of the competition has a chance. Weekly emails and phone calls regarding the person's leaving date (especially six months or more before said date) is NOT acceptable behaviour. I say again, GO AWAY.

At this point, I add that this type of action would be made ever-so-slightly more understandable if you lived in a city where jobs and apartments were hard to come by... but if you live in a place where both are available in relatively good quantity, apartment and employment lurking is unacceptable, and frankly, a wee bit on the creepy side of life.

So take it from a victim of the dreaded uber-lurking that is plaguing our fair town: if you express interest in a person's job or home, and the person tells you that he or she "will let you know", wait 'til he or she LETS YOU KNOW before planning where you'd put the couch or what potted plant would look good in the office window. Please.

9 Comments:

At 7:14 AM, Blogger Thérèse said...

Oooh, that's creepy.

It's like someone is lurking your LIFE.

You know, I once saw a movie wherein someone actually wanted to take over someone else's life. And did it.

Be waaaaarrrrrry...

Not of me. Of your lurker. But still.

Be waaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrryyyyyy.....

 
At 7:22 AM, Blogger jenn said...

I know!

It's called "The Hand That Rocks The Cradle" and it's a verrrrry creepy movie.

Worry not- I am sufficiently wary...

 
At 8:55 AM, Blogger Thérèse said...

And if you need the brute force, I know some people.

You know? Some people?

I'm just saying, I know some people.

 
At 8:57 AM, Blogger jenn said...

Hee. Are any of them called Uncle Carmine or Vinnie? 'Cause that would be cool if the were. I'm just saying...

 
At 12:10 PM, Blogger Thérèse said...

Aunt Viola, actually. *taps nose*

She's very well connected.

 
At 12:14 PM, Blogger sarah said...

I've also heard "lurker" used to describe a giant pimple...how appropriate.

 
At 12:28 PM, Blogger jenn said...

Therese- Good ol' Aunt Viola! I like the sounds of that!

Sarah- you're right- it IS strangely appropriate... interesting... and a little bit odd ;)

 
At 3:08 PM, Blogger Grumball said...

What intense weirdness. I'd probably have to be upfront about it and tell them I don't plan on passing away anytime soon, and that even if I did I wouldn't will them my life.

It seems that your situation is encroaching on the fine line between lurking and stalking here. I also advise caution. Don't stop in the middle of the road to eat random unattended piles of birdseed. You may be struck by an "Acme" brand hammer or missile.

 
At 5:19 AM, Blogger jenn said...

Hahahaa- Thanks, Graham. I'll be sure to keep my eye out for such suspicious piles of things...

 

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